Wednesday, May 05, 2010
Siao Liao!!
Had my 1st UOL paper today
POA
Dunno wad I writing throughout the exam
a blur of figures
rushing to finish the paper
siao liao
but no time to fret
got other papers to score!!
rock on baby!!
so he said @
8:02 PM
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
ra ra ooh laa laa
to the heart and mind ignorance is kind
there's no comfort in the truth
pain is all you'll find
unmistakably
awake in the middle of the night and I'm thinking of her
AGAIN.
not in an emo 'I can't love her' way
more of 'wanna see her and talk to her'
but trust me
it's easier to strike 4d than strike up a conversation
and given the upcoming exams and 'the van's' constant buzzing around
it just gets harder
hello loose loose roy
*oops*
so he said @
4:18 AM
Sunday, March 14, 2010
suda ini machiam???
so he said @
9:05 PM
Saturday, March 13, 2010
swee la!!
new look for my iphone
swee boh??
nice rite...I think so too kekkeke
a new outlook
a new beginning perhaps?
so he said @
3:38 AM
Thursday, March 11, 2010
投其所好
do it!!
so he said @
4:48 AM
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Recovery Mode
it has been a long and tough week
physically exhausting
emotionally draining
my emotions took a roller coaster ride
婆婆这样就走了
she went off very peacefully
no suffering
hope she is happy in heaven now
losing a loved one is tough to accept
even tougher to recover
I need to bounce back
life is about getting back up everytime you fall
I'm sure 婆婆 wants me to do well too
to all those who msg-ed me
thank you for all your concern
appreciate it
jiayou bah!!
so he said @
2:18 PM
Monday, March 01, 2010
where are you
a listening ear
what I really need now...
so he said @
4:18 AM
"Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you was beyond my control. "
so he said @
2:41 AM
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Sorrow
these few days have been spend on trips to the hospital
grandma has been admitted
and this time her condition looks gloomy
seeing her lying there
breathing with the aid of an oxygen mask
unable to move or speak
limbs swollen because of water retention
I am utterly saddened
and feeling helpless
to be very frank
there is nothing much we can do
other than make her feel as comfortable as possible
smack in the middle of my prelims
totally moodless to go for papers
my grandma is definitely more important
I know this sounds terrible
hard to accept
but the reality is
they can't operate on her because of her weak heart and old age
doctor has asked us to prepare for the worst
she might not make it pass the weekend
and if she pulls through
she has about 2-3 months
due to the cancerous cyst in her stomach
just now
while driving my aunt to the temple to pray
she was talking to a hk relative on the phone
and as she spoke about my grandma's condition
she started crying
my eyes welled up with tears
and I cried too
I can so feel her sorrow
suddenly, she is going to lose her mum that she has stayed with for her whole life
she was talking about how she wanted my grandma to go home
even if she has 2 months left
so she could see the new fridge she had just bought
but that if my grandma felt that she was suffering, she can 'go off' with no worries
but if she can fight and hang on my aunt will bring her home to see the fridge
and live off her remaining days
hearing all that just utterly broke my heart
till now
I'm still awake
worried of what I might face when I go to the hospital later in the day
the gloom of impending doom
life and death matters have never been very easy things to deal with
some things are just beyond our control
I just pray that grandma pulls through this round
whatever comes later is another issue
1 hurdle after another
I need a shoulder to lean on
I need someone to talk to
if only 'you' will call
=(
so he said @
5:21 AM
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Just wanna hear your voice, see your smile
here I am again
with a random blog post
writing just cheers me up so much
even though nobody reads my blog
Gong Xi Fa Cai Huat Ar!!
CNY has just breezed by
after much feasting and gambling
it's back to harsh reality T_T
boy are the prelims heading my way
seriously lacking the motivation to study hard
no sense of urgency
think the prelims will be a nasty wake up call
so will try to do my best
2 days more to 1st paper...gosh!
I CONFESS!!
wanna shout it out loud
I'm missing somebody!!
the force is strong
LOL =x
can only think nia
thinking not a crime rite?!
have an urge to call her...just to hear her voice...ask her how she is
but I have this feeling we'll just end up with an awkward silence after a few words (if she picks up in the 1st place)
MSN will be single word replies
SMS wun be replied
short of going to her place (you think your house ar!!)
erm pigeons??
letters through snail mail might be a viable solution
but really, is there a need to O.o
argh argh
life's pretty hard when exchanging more than 5 words at a gathering is considered a monumental achievement
BUT...
hold your horses
Roy's spider senses is tingling
the big iceberg will melt...bit by bit...slowly
endure pls...even if it is a little change in attitude
I'll take it =)
hoping
waiting
missing
life goes on
so he said @
6:37 PM
Friday, February 19, 2010
when you're feeling lousy and you know it come and blog
I just decided to log onto FB
via the phone
I really shouldn't have
and the heart sank a little
no matter how much I told myself not to think
I admit
I was bothered
I dunno
Disappointment I guess
not a msg
not an invitation
I think it's just reality
Forgotten is the word
and I'm still hoping it's an honest mistake
hahahahahhaah
pls lah
what to do nvm lor =(
sad is not a good state of mind to be in
so he said @
3:26 AM
Monday, February 15, 2010
Gong Xi Fa Cai
first day of the chinese new year
was spent collecting angbaos, eating and more eating
wanted to go to 'somebody's' house
but had to go airport pick up a relative at night
so couldn't go in the end
I'm sorry I couldn't go
I really am
tonight can leh but will you jio again?
hope so bah ^^
so he said @
3:00 AM
Sunday, February 14, 2010
I HEART U
Yea it's officially the year of the tiger and vday all rolled into 1
and...
first thing I do is to give flowers to somebody
I have been hesitating actually
but aiya just give lah
and I was pleasantly surprised
just glad I've made the effort
though it may not signify anything
but it means a lot to me
and THAT'S the most impt thing
yay!!
alright angbaos galore later *I hope*
woohoo =)
so he said @
4:28 AM
Saturday, February 06, 2010
Remember the 5 simple rules to be happy.
1. Free your heart from hatred - forgive.
2. Free your mind from worries - most never happen.
3. Live simply and appreciate what you have.
4. Give more.
5. Expect less.
so he said @
2:55 PM
当一个人发现前面是一条绝路
如果不向前冲一步
便会非死不可
置之死地而后生
inspired by a show
so true
so damn true
so he said @
1:18 PM
Saturday, January 30, 2010
FINALLY FREE!!
yeehaw ~~~
I'm out of camp =)
free from the bonds of reservist training
well, at least for another year
it has been a tiring 2.5 wks
waking up early
training under the hot sun
doing very physical stuff
I went in with a heavy heart
was so unwilling to leave the civilian world behind
thinking of somebody
worried about my studies
yet I'm feeling thankful right now
cause the tough training woke me up
gave me a big jolt
made me think
and realise just how silly I had been
some issues just have no solution
time will change things
a few months down the road
for better
or for worse
no one knows definitely
so no point worrying over things that you can't control
and no one wants to go out with an emo boy rite ;-)
for now
most impt
is to get ready for exams
the rest
just leave things to fate bah
maybe it's better this way
so he said @
11:48 AM
Monday, January 25, 2010
TRYING HARD NOT TO DO ANYTHING IS VERY HARD
back to camp in a few hours time
back to the hellhole
for round 2
haix
endure!!
as I was watching the movie this afternoon
I had a sudden pang of longing-ness
it just hit me
wanted to call her so much at that moment
even if it was just to hear her voice
even if it was just to say a hello
I know
she's going through a rough patch
and the best thing I can do is keep away
don't give her more trouble
even though I so wish to be her shoulder to lean on
she'll prob never see this
but I'm gonna pen it down anyway
if you so happen to come across this blog and see this msg
and you want someone to talk to
to listen to you
please sms me
or even call me
I'll be more than willing to be your listening ear
naive silly boy =(
so he said @
4:18 AM
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
emo momo
yea awake now
just suddenly woke from my sleep
and looked around my room
such a pretty sight
feeling emo abt going back to camp
back to all the sian-ness
counting down to the last day sia
pls hurry hurry finish everything
let me back into the civilian world where I can get things done
wth!
seeing her in the canteen today
I stole a glance at her
really wanted to look at her
and say hi
but couldn't
and didn't
deep down
I know she means so much to me
yet I can't get into her world
have her attention
that is the hurting part
give me a chance
give me some space to communicate
I need some luck
=)
so he said @
5:01 AM
